My Exercise Diary - Day 7

Day 7.

Well, that's the week. Thank goodness that's over. Maybe next time my wife will give me something a little more fun, like a gift certificate for a root canal.

My Exercise Diary - Day 6

Day 6.

Got Janell's message on my answering machine, wondering where I am. I lacked the strength to use the TV remote so I watched eleven straight hours of the weather channel.

My Exercise Diary - Day 5

Day 5.

I hate "Jillian" more than any human being has ever hated any other

human being in the history of the world. If there was any part on my body not in extreme pain I would hit her with it. She thought it would be a good idea to work on my triceps. Well I have news for you Jillian - I don't have triceps. And if you don't want dents in the floor don't hand me any barbells. I refuse to accept responsibility for the damage, YOU went to sadist school, YOU are to blame. The treadmill flung me back into a science teacher, which hurt like crazy. Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like a music teacher, or social studies?

My Exercise Diary - Day 4

Day 4.

Janell was waiting for me with her vampire teeth in a full snarl. I can't help it if I was half an hour late, it took me that long just to tie my shoes. She wanted me to lift dumbbells.
Not a chance, Janell. The word "dumb" must be in there for a reason. I hid in the men's room until she sent Lars looking for me. As punishment she made me try the rowing machine.
It sank.

My Exercise Diary - Day 3

Day 3.

The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the tooth brush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I am certain that I have developed a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer. I parked on top of a Volkswagen. Janell was a little impatient with me and said my screaming was bothering the other club members. The treadmill hurt my chest so I did the stair monster. Why would anyone invent a machine to simulate and activity rendered obsolete by the invention of elevators? Janell told me regular exercise would make me live longer. I can't imagine anything worse.

My Exercise Diary - Day 2

Day 2.

Took a whole pot of hot chocolate to get me out the door, but I made it. Janell had me lie on my back and push this heavy iron bar up into the air. Then she put weights on it, for heaven's sake. Legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made it a full mile. Her smile made it all worth while. Muscles all feel GREAT.

My Exercise Diary - Day 1

I found this story several years ago - and have wanted to share it ever since. I don't know where the original originated from - I have made some minor changes. I thought it would be appropriate to share this now since it is the first of a new year. I will post each day this week to give you motivation to continue with your new fitness resolutions.

My Exercise Diary

For Christmas this year my wife purchased me a week of private lessons at the local health club. Though still in great shape from when I was on the varsity chess team in high school, I decided it was a good idea to go ahead and try it. I called to make reservations with someone named Janell, who said she is a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and athletic clothing model. My wife seemed very pleased with how enthusiastic I was to get started. They suggested I keep an "exercise diary" to chart my progress.

Day 1.

Started the morning at 6:00 am. Tough to get up, but worth it when I arrived at the health club and Janell was waiting for me. She's something of a goddess, with blond hair and a dazzling white smile. She showed me the machines and took my pulse after five minutes on the treadmill. She seemed a little alarmed that it was so high, but I think just standing next to her in that outfit of hers added about ten points. Enjoyed watching the aerobics class. Janell was very encouraging as I did my sit ups, though my gut was already aching a little from holding it in the whole time I was talking to her. This is going to be GREAT!

Runners don't Swim

Runnergirl takes to the pool - like a runner. Runners breathe in the nose out the mouth. Just try that in the pool, oh yeah and Don't forget to call 911. Lots of coughing, sputtering and splashing. Running is much simpler, first off - water never gets up your nose and when you sweat, it evaporates. Next, you don't ever put on goggles that suck out your eyeballs. Lastly, you don't generally bonk your head on a hard slab of concrete. Well, I guess that last part could happen.

Sounds like fun. Guess I will try it again. Flip turns are pretty cool. Just remember to blow out your nose or you may end up with a serious sinus infection. You thought the butterfly was a cute little insect. I think I swallowed one trying it. My shoulders are still aching. Not as much sputtering and coughing.

Runners and swimmers may have something in common. Discipline and pain.
Can runners swim? I'll let you know by the end of the summer.

P.S. I do have motivation....My kids swim better than me.

TRX

Just wanted to introduce a little piece of equipment that recently replaced all of my weightlifting equipment. The TRX suspension system has been great! I had a whole room dedicated to my weights and machines for personal training and for keeping myself fit. I sold all of it and changed it out for the TRX. I can get a great workout without needing a whole room to keep all of my equipment.

I took it to the park this morning and had a great workout. The TRX is portable, fun and anyone can use it - it doesn't matter what kind of shape you are in. A professional athlete and a couch potato could use this and get results. The TRX was used on the "Biggest Loser" this past season.


Normally, I don't recommend anyone purchase home fitness equipment because it usually ends up being an expensive coat rack. Never used and taking up to much space. The TRX is much different and I would recommend to anyone. As a personal trainer, I would recommend the TRX as one of the best pieces of equipment I have ever used. As an owner of a TRX, I would recommend the TRX as the most versatile pieces of equipment I have ever owned.

If anyone is interested in purchasing a TRX, I am a TRX affiliate. Just click on any of the TRX links on my blog and it will take you to my storefront or use this link:

https://www.fitnessanywhere.com/Merchant2/merchant.mvc?Screen=SFNT&AFFIL=Fn634X75

Keep your Girlish Figure

A few weeks ago we went to the city Health Fair. There were a few testing stations set up to supposedly tell us how healthy (or sickly) we are. Mr. Smiley and I both had our body fat, glucose, bone density and cholesterol checked. Mr. Smiley had his body fat tested first. He fell within the normal/healthy range for a man of his age and height. His number was on the high end of normal. Body Fat woman (the tech) told him he needed to start exercising and eat better and he could lower his body fat. I was annoyed.

Next it was my turn. I also fell in the normal/healthy range for my age and height. My number was on the low end of normal. Body Fat woman then started lecturing me about being to thin. How I am sooo unhealthy because I don't have enough fat. What a load of garbage. I was getting pretty mad. She then said, "You must be a runner! YOU RUNNERS just don't know when to stop." I started fuming. The steam was coming out of my ears when she delivered the final blow. "Don't even think about getting your bone density tested it will be horrible." she snidely remarked.

So I immediately went over to get my Bone Density tested. The tech there was in shock as she told me my bone density was the best she had ever tested. Take that body fat woman. Can't good ever be good enough? I would like that body fat woman to know that I am proud of my body fat percentage. I think it is healthy for me. Not to mention that I have had a body fat percentage in the past that was 11% lower than what I tested that day. And I was healthy then too. I think she was just jealous. I am happy with my body. I work to keep it the way I want it. Oh maybe I am just lucky because I am tall and have good genetics. Don't ever mention the fact that I get up at dark thirty in the morning and have for many years to try to keep my body fit.

Don't mean to open a can of worms. (I will open that can later) Most people who are fit and healthy work at it. They don't just become that way overnight. God has given us all an amazing gift - our body. We all choose what we do with our bodies. Let us do the best we can with what we have been given. Some are thin, some are fat. Some need to lose weight, some need to gain. I just wish it was as easy as Betty Boop demonstrates.

This is my all time favorite cartoon about weight and exercise. I always laugh at this film. Just over 5 minutes in length. It is worth watching the whole thing.